Have you heard the story of the two monks and the heavy load? It is a Zen tale passed down for centuries in Buddhist teachings.

One day two traveling monks reached a town and saw a young woman waiting to step out of her sedan chair. There were deep, muddy puddles and she couldn’t step across without getting mud on her silk robes. She impatiently scolded her attendants, who were burdened with heavy packages.

The younger monk walked by the young woman without speaking. But the older monk stopped and picked her up on his back, carrying her across the mud. Not only did she not thank the monk, she shoved him out of her way when he put her down and scurried by him haughtily.

As the two monks continued on their way, the younger monk was brooding. After a long time, he finally spoke out. “That woman was so rude but you picked her up and carried her! She didn’t even thank you.”

“I set the woman down hours ago,” the older monk responded. “Why are you still carrying her?”

What are you holding on to today that is burdening you?

You might be playing a conversation or a past situation that upset you over and over in your mind. Ask yourself, is it happening now? When it happens again, how do I want to respond differently?

Perhaps you had a challenging parenting moment and are carrying guilt. Observe your child with curiosity; is she still upset about it? If so, acknowledge what happened so you both can move on. If she has already moved past it, let it go!

Remember that letting go is a gift to yourself. You will feel better and will be healthier and more present when you do.

Do you have trouble with transitions? Are you the type of person who feels most comfortable when a job or project is finally complete? Or do you love new beginnings and thrive on change?

If any of the above are true for you, you are not alone! Most people have a hard time with the uncomfortable middle place. It can be a space of learning and growth but often is described as "boring" or even "stuck."

This week, I am turning to the simple wisdom of A.A. Milne, the author of the Winnie-the-Pooh series and other books and poems for children.



"Halfway down"

Halfway down the stairs
Is a stair where I sit:
There isn't any other stair quite like it.
I'm not at the bottom,
I'm not at the top:
So this is the stair where I always stop.

Halfway up the stairs
Isn't up, and isn't down.
It isn't in the nursery, it isn't the town:
And all sorts of funny thoughts
Run around my head:
"It isn't really anywhere! It's somewhere else instead!"

- A.A. Milne

Often we become so attached to the outcome or completion of a project or experience that we forget to just enjoy the "here and now." Today, reflect on the halfway places in your life. How can you be more comfortable right where you are instead of striving to be somewhere else?

Our family loves to ride bikes. From commuting to work to participating in long distance rides, my husband and I have always enjoyed the simplicity, sustainability, health benefits and great fun of riding bikes. But when you have small children, family rides can get a little more complicated. Through two kids, I've had experiences with balance bikes, mini bikes that attach to the back of an adult bike, and front- and rear-mounted child seats, so I thought I'd share a few impressions on our favorite kids' bike seat to date: The iBert Safe-T Seat.

Our toddler can balance for long distances on his pedal-free kids' bike. It's great for his own play, but not suitable for riding as a family.

When my older son (who is now 17) was little, I used a bike seat that attached to the back of my bicycle. While he enjoyed getting out on the bike with his mom, he often complained that he couldn’t see anything (besides my backside) and I didn’t like how difficult it was to talk to him. As he grew older, we got a Trail-A-Bike that was a blast for us both. We rode daily to school and even did some short “long distance” rides (25 miles) with friends.

Now, our younger son wants to be more involved in our bicycling adventures. He isn’t willing to sit quietly in a trailer and we knew he would want to see everything we were seeing from our bikes. So after my husband made a trip to Tokyo and saw countless Japanese families riding around with front-mounted child bike seats, we researched front seats online and found one available in the U.S.

The iBert Safe-T Seat allows our toddler to really participate in the ride. Since the seat faces forward and attaches near the handlebars, he can see where we are going, is able to talk to us while we are riding and feels safe right between our arms rather than being banished to the back of the bike. Out on a typical ride, he points out objects like airplanes, animals (he loves cats) and other bicyclists and is able to put his hands on the handlebars (which can be a liability if you aren’t paying attention).

The iBert Safe-T is recommended for children ages one to four with a maximum weight of 38 pounds and a maximum height of 42 inches.

The cost is reasonable compared to seats that go on the back of a bike - at around $85 it's cheaper than some, and costs more than just a few. Better still, assembly is a piece of cake - it literally took five minutes to install, and has a quick-release for the seat so you can ride solo again quickly. That's a great feature!

There are two drawbacks to the iBert:

1. Your handlebar stem needs to have 3/4" clearance for the iBert to fit properly, so make sure to measure it if you're thinking about getting one. Our family is proof that the mounting bar doesn’t fit on all bikes - it fits on two of the five bikes we have between us.


2. Ergonomically, it doesn't work equally for all users. My husband is tall (6 foot 1 inch) and he still has plenty of knee room to pedal. For me at 5 foot 3 inches tall, it is not as comfortable. Reaching over my son to get to my handlebars, I feel crowded. So, he usually rides with his Dad.

The seat has a very minimal affect on the handling of the bicycle and the balance feels natural, with more of the weight towards the front rather than the back of the bike.

Overall, the iBert seat is simple to use and our son loves it so much he asks to go on bike rides!