I took my toddler to a unique interactive theater performance this past weekend called Play After Play. It began with a simple and engaging play that felt more like storytelling than performance. After the play, the actors arranged large mats in the center of the room and invited the children to play with them.

The actors are also play specialists and interact with the children through a process called Original Play. They model kind, loving touch and cooperation rather than competition or resistance. Each child is invited to participate but there is no judgment or coercion. The parents are instructed to sit back and witness the children rather than guide or instruct them.

The term "Original Play" was first coined by O. Fred Donaldson, Ph.D. He researched play in children, adults and wild animals for 25 years and wrote the Pulitzer Prize nominated book, Playing By Heart: The Vision and Practice of Belonging. He found that the type of play modeled through Original Play is innate in children 3 years old and younger and in wild animals.

Original Play contends that much of the way we teach children to play is culturally informed and displaces some of their natural play instincts. It suggests that there is a universal language of play that foster relationships and self-esteem. Playing competitive games or sports, playing with the intention of “fun” or playing to show off skills are not part of Original Play. The point is always, no matter what, to focus on connection.

At the “Play After Play,” the play specialists stayed down on the floor on mats with the kids, sending them a message that they are playmates on the kid’s level and stepping out of the roles of teacher or adult. They also closely matched each child’s energy and responded to their movements. So, if a child was being shy or hesitant, instead of trying to cajole them into playing, the play specialist also acted shy and hesitant. If the child was exuberant and bouncing, the play specialist was as well.

It often looked to me like they were dancing. The children were crawling over and under the play specialists and moving their bodies in sync. At times there was an animal-like nature to the play: on hands and knees, bowing to each other in an invitation to interact (much like I have seen my dog do when playing with other dogs).

If the children got too rough, the play specialists kindly and non-verbally guided the child back towards the more respectful play. There was no shaming, no removal of attention. There was also no praise or encouragement if the children played appropriately. The kids seemed to naturally want to match the play specialists’ type of play. There was a clear focus on safety and awareness of the play area.

I left the event thinking about the way I play with my toddler in a new way. He seemed to naturally feel safe and comfortable in this play environment even though there were about 15 kids and many of them older than him. I thought about how I often try to get him to play in the way that I think he would want to play, rather than following his lead and matching his energy.

Since that day, I have taken some time every day to get down on the floor with him and wait. Wait for him to jump on me, wait for him to show me how he wants to play! If you would like more information about Original Play, visit the group's website.